Each one of us has fallen prey to these people who play the dreaded victim card. Sometimes, we understand what is happening and sometimes it’s a little too late to realise.
Those instances which end up looking like it’s your fault because they can count a hundred things before you can fathom the effect of the current one. That is when you can realise that the other person is always the victim and can usually lead to the circumstances of self-doubt. It feels like you are the worst person to be with and that you must pay back the price for the discomfort caused to the other. However, that is not even the sad part.
The saddest part of this feeling is that these people sometimes don’t even know that they’re doing it. They have become such prodigy in manipulation that they don’t even realise the actuality of their actions. That there is an absence of communication and self-understanding and that you also are the part of the problem.
It is like an addiction. You are unaware of the fact that it costs your relationships and yet you enjoy the benefits in the current situation until the other person notices it and you have come too far to admit to them now. Of course, there must be people out there doing it deliberately for their own good but this is another perspective in light.
Sometimes, the purpose is to attract attention from the ones that are close to heart because of feeling neglected. Still, it is important to understand that this is not a women-oriented issue. It is not gendered specific and in fact, many men have been known to confide in these terms to escape from the responsibilities for which they are not yet ready.
The only cure to this lack of self-sense is the power of realisation to it. People can use the art of giving subtle hints rather than imposing the thoughts. Even then if they can’t put the pieces together, let them go. It is important to understand that even if they won an argument, somewhere they lost the connection. Whining may get you an instant escape from taking the responsibility for your actions but communicating is the key to a long lasting relationship and a fulfilling life.